Monday, March 23, 2009

Unsettled

We leave for Europe in a week and a day, and I find that I'm already experiencing that feeling of dislocation that overtakes me every time I go away. It may be a function of age, but it seems to kick in earlier each time. Perhaps the roots grow deeper as we age, harder to pull up from the familiar ground. My head reminds me sagely that everything is in flux, but my heart and body resist the discomforts of change. More and more, when the time to leave approaches, I want to stay at home. Impractical, in our case, because our grandchildren live in England, as does my sister and her family, and the only way we can get to see them on a regular basis is to get on a plane and fly there.

This morning I woke early, filled with a gnawing anxiety. Its focus was not the coming journey, though. Instead, the anxiety was deflected into a different source: earthquakes--particularly the much-anticipated Big One. We are not prepared, as we know we should be. It's a foolishness I keep reminding myself to correct, and this morning I lay in bed thinking of those things we need: water, packaged foods, a new first aid kit (the last one we bought must be twenty years old by now,) sterno cooking equipment, gloves and tools... I promised myself the long-postponed trip to the Target store, or Costco.

Meantime, I have been thinking this past weekend about blessings. I plan to post some thoughts in The Buddha Diaries tomorrow. Unless the Big One strikes before tomorrow comes...

6 comments:

digitalzen said...

Hi Peter,
This may help.
http://crackerboy.us/page-three/misc/emergency-preparedness-checklist/
bw

Anonymous said...

How well we know that feeling. Here we are only three weeks or so away from leaving Vermont and still haven't found a home on the other end. And, yes, it does get harder with age. The stamina just isn't there to weather uncertainty like we used to. Have a good visit with family---that will take care of those feelings! peace MandT

Anonymous said...

I hope you are able to let the anxiety go and enjoy the trip.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
robin andrea said...

I understand that anxiety so well. We are in southern California as I type this, and I dreaded the journey for days. I am a homebody. I should have been born many centuries ago when I would have never had to move over so many miles to spend time over dinner with loved ones.

I hope your journey is a good one.

There won't be a big earthquake for some time. Although, I'm not always right about these things. Best to be prepared.

Peter Clothier said...

bw, thanks for the link. It looks to be a useful one.

MandT, I do wish you well in your forthcoming move, and sympathize with the agony of it. By the time I return from Europe, in late April, I trust that I'll find you in a more settled place.

Citizen, yes... I do get to enjoy things once I get where I'm going. It's in good part the anticipation.

Deleted... why?

Robin, we'll be coming down to Laguna tomorrow afternoon and staying through Sunday. Will you still be in the area? Isn't it time for that long-delayed face-to-face? I'd love the opportunity...