Monday, May 27, 2019


It is fifty years to the day since Ellie and I first met. The first feeling is gratitude. For the love. For all the good times and the years we have spent together. For the encouragement, support and celebration of each other's individual needs and aspirations; and for the mutual honoring of what is best in each of us--and for the tolerance of what is worst!

Next comes the sadness, first for the pain we caused to others in our early days, and the pain we were given to suffer ourselves in order to come together. That pain still lingers in the heart from long ago. I am thankful to have learned not to hold on to it, but never fail to acknowledge it when it arises.

The greater sadness is for the toll the years have taken on our bodies and, to a lesser but observable degree, our minds: we are forgetful, the memory is not so sharp and eager as it used to be. And after fifty years there has been a significant loss of strength and energy.

And there is physical pain, not untypical of age. To celebrate this momentous anniversary we took a lovely walk in the Huntington Gardens the other day...

Surrounded by the spectacular natural beauty that has been created there, we were more in awe than suffering; but towards the end of our nearly three-mile walk--it would have been a breeze ten years ago--the pain set in with a vengeance. Ellie has more to tolerate than I, but by the time we arrived back at our departure point my own hips and back and thighs were reminding me forcefully of their deterioration.

It is the spirit, though, that remains the source of joy. The spirit is what continues to uplift and remind us of all that we have to be grateful for. Not least those fifty years of union. So today I wish us both a Happy Anniversary!

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