Saturday, January 21, 2012

KINDNESS

It's a simple thing, but we seem to be in danger of losing it in our hasty, heedless culture: kindness. This thought was brought to mind by an email I received from a faithful reader (she knows who she is!) after my entry the other day about what I judged to be a disappointing response to my promotional efforts for "Mind Work." Her words were a simple act of kindness, a generous gesture that did not go unappreciated.

Kindness arises, surely, from compassion, the most basic of all Buddhist qualities. It should not be mistaken for a mere softness of heart--the kind that is mocked by conservatives in their scorn for "bleeding heart liberals." Kindness needs to be practiced with generosity, but also with skill and discrimination. It should not be used to reward or condone self-pity, because then it would neither encourage nor support the change that might be needed. To use it unskillfully can as easily cause harm to others as to not use it at all.

And yet there is a great deal of un-kindness in the world today. We need only look at the words and actions of our politicians--much in the news, regrettably--to be aware of its toxic ubiquity in our national dialogue. It feeds on itself and breeds itself, infecting every aspect of our lives. It takes the form of incivility in the social context--from the halls of government to our city streets and highways, even in the intimacy of our homes. In our personal lives, it can range all the way from curt dismissiveness to outright cruelty and abuse.

I aspire to be kind. I am at my kindest when I am least concerned with myself, my own needs, my own beliefs and attitudes. In the course of an average day, I have many unkind impulses, many unkind thoughts. The least I can do it to try to notice them as they arise, recognize them for what they are, and having recognized, to transform them into their kind counterparts. As with most Buddhist practices, it's quite simple--but it's hard! (I find it especially hard to feel an ounce of kindness toward those "conservative" politicians: can I see things from their point of view? No! Can I imagine that they might be right, that I might be wrong? No! Do I credit them at least with sincerity in their beliefs, with good intentions? Perhaps kindness should also not be used to condone wrong-headedness.)

* * * * * * *

From my morning's meditation:


PRACTICE...

... breathing each breath
as though it were my last;
wishing, if it were granted me,
to cross that last threshold
refreshed, invigorated, freed
from all negative emotion;
clear-minded, open-hearted,
body and mind devoid of stress,
ready for the next adventure.

This practice inspired by my current reading of Living Fully: Finding Joy in Every Breath by Shyalpa Tenzin Rinpoche. I'll have more to say about the book when I've finished reading it.

Metta to all!

2 comments:

kara rane said...

Now this is Inspired ☆

CHI SPHERE said...

I have studied Buddha and find him refreshing, challenging and recognize the value of metta; the multi-significant term meaning loving-kindness, friendliness, goodwill, benevolence, fellowship, amity, concord, inoffensiveness and non-violence does not ever enter into the world of political struggle. In fact political struggle is another world that is separated from the world at large. Being so it is of little value to humankind.

Though life is change it seems that political change simple slows progress each 2 to 4 years by reversal, subterfuge or worse. At a time in human evolution where the internet allows collective thought to flourish and join forces it seems that political leaders wish to suppress it in order to maintain control of the body politic. I have lived in China in an SAR where there is some internet freedom and in mainland China where there is little to none. Clearly Syria, Iran and much of the middle East remains in the dark ages. Where is "KINDNESS" in this world? It exists in my family and at work with my painting partners. I wish for world peace and inspiration.